Fremont to be realigned with the universe

If you’ve felt a little “off” in the neighborhood recently, it may be because the Center of the Universe is a bit off-kilter.

On Saturday at noon — right as the parade gets underway — a Troll contingent will gather to correct the placement of the arrow that connects Fremont with the Center of the Universe. “Solstice Parade attendees may unfortunately experience side effects of euphoria, clarity and unexplained motivation. Relief may be found by dancing in the streets,” the Fremont Arts Council says.